For many years, I have been leading workshops on the Alchemy of Relationships, helping people find their partners and/or harmonise the relationships they already established. The list below is compiled of a variety of spiritual systems ranging from Kabbalah, to Daoism, Yoga and Astrology.
1. Give your partner what he/she wants before they ask for it. If you wait for them to ask, they would most likely do it in a way that would make you reactive.
2. Balance your relationships! Libra, the sign of relationships is symbolised by the scales. Give as much as you receive, talk as much as you listen, gift as much as you are gifted.
3. Give your partner space. While Location, Location, Location is the real estate agents’ mantra, Space, Space, Space should be yours.
4. Communicate about everything immediately! Don’t wait. We have a tendency to hold things inside and start having conversations in our head.
5. Communicate right away but not when you are emotionally charged. Most of the ancient Greek tragedies (emphasis on the tragedy) were weaved around the clashing between the opposing forces of reason and passion. Both energy fields are needed in a relationship, but keep the reason for conversations and passion to the bedroom. Don’t mix!
6. NEVER take your partner for granted! That is the apocalypse of all relationships. Always spend a few moments thanking the Universe, God, your mother-in-law and your good fortune for sending you your loved one.
7. Relationships evolve. Don’t try to avoid change, it’s the inevitable. According to Taoism, we start our relationships with the Yang, masculine principle, but if we want the relationship to continue to evolve we must move to the Yin, feminine principle. Yang is the part when we fall in love, have sex three times a day act all cute and childlike. It’s super fun, but it can burn us if we don’t cool it and move to the Yin principle. Yin symbolises the feminine energies of family, security, commitment.
8. Try to make friends with your partner’s friends and have your partner connect to your friends. The Sufi say – show me your friends and I will tell you who you are. Most important, make sure to establish common friends as a couple.
9. Do not punish! Even if your partner is infuriating and did not wash the dishes or never pair up the socks or even when they forget to check the pockets before putting the colour and whites mixed in the washing machine. When you punish the one closest to you, you punish yourself. It’s self-destructive.
10. Always keep an element of surprise. Spontaneity, adventures, breaking the routine and doing together things you have never done before (camping, travelling to an exotic country, mountain climbing) will generate stories that belong only to the two of you. It’s like creating your own mythology. According to Kabbalah, God created the Universe with a story. You can recreate your relationship with these stories.
Join Gahl in Camden…
synchronising relationships:
soulmates, love + how nothing is a coincidence
21 + 22 july
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